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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Ruler of my room and all within it's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, May 24th, 2008
4:00 pm
Things change
I went for my second interview on Monday. They said they would get back to me by Wednesday. I couldn't sleep much Tuesday night and spent half of Wednesday asleep- half-hoping I could just sleep until they called me.

But they never did. Wednesday evening was very, very, hard. I kept rocketting back and forth between trying to be confident and then not wanting to set myself up for disappointment if they said no, like all the others.

Thursday I woke up and they still hadn't called. I continued getting worried.

Then the phone chirped. It was them. Read more...Collapse )
Monday, April 21st, 2008
12:13 am
Passover officially done
Seder started at 5:00, most people left between 9 and 9:30. Cleaned from 10:30 to now.

Final tally: 11 people, 3 days of cooking, about 250 dollars in food and wine, plus an extra 100 for Haggadah copies.

Stress level was high leading up to this, but the seder was very enjoyable. Many compliments on my Haggadah- I think this is the first seder that my father has enjoyed in just about ever. Political digressions caused us to go long and forced me to cut/skim most of the Grace After Meals and Hallel, but we still managed to get in everything that was really important to the GF and me. And everyone loved the food.

All that and I only barely had a glass of wine (1 wine, one grape juice). I'm happy I get to sleep in tomorrow (no one else gets to, sadly).

And now we get to eat this meal for the next week.

Another life and Jew-y milestone. This went very well.

Thanks, Universe.
Sunday, April 6th, 2008
1:33 pm
Vegan coffee cake: Food of the Gods?
All signs say yes.

Hooray for chocolate-chocolate chip coffee cake with that crumbly streuzel stuff on top- which both Dad and I can eat (and which only had 2 sticks of margarine).

GF wins major points.
Saturday, April 5th, 2008
5:03 pm
Apparently I am officially a teacher
Last week I noticed some writing on the wall of my classroom in Chinatown:

"Fuck u Mr. [Me]"

This week my students told me that someone in the same handwriting had written, "I hate Mr. [Me]" in the other classroom.

I told them, "Well, that means I must be doing something right."
Wednesday, March 19th, 2008
8:26 am
Subbing today, then interviewing with the internship/credential program. A group interview- me and 5 schmucks, plus the interviewers. It sounds like it might be pretty low key or just a formality, but I can't take that chance. Therfore, I will be sharpening my mental knives while at school today.

Hmm... Knives in school. That might be something to keep to myself.

In other news, the GF and I are going to host a seder. I have already written 13 pages- about 9 of which are a smart-ass retelling of the Exodus. The remainder consist of things like, "The Six Depressing Symbols on the Seder Plate" and "The 'Four' Questions and their Misleading Answers."

This should be fun.
Thursday, March 6th, 2008
5:21 pm
My first day
Substituting at the public school, despite some earlier concerns, went pretty well. Frankly, though, I think I'm better suited to older students (3-5). I think their language acquisition and such just makes it easier for me to talk to them, and vice-versa. (I tried to pick a book I thought would be appropriate and it turns out it was way over their heads, for instance.)

Best moment of the day: a couple of the 4th graders whose class I've been helping out in spotted me through the window at the end of the day and poked their heads in.

"You're in kindergarten? How come?"

"Well, their teacher was out sick, so they called me."

(Disgusted groan) "How come you never teach OUR CLASS?"

Aww. Give it time, kid. I'm sure your teacher's just about ready for a much needed day off.
Tuesday, March 4th, 2008
5:19 pm
Hey E-channel
I don't care how small their bikinis are, "golf ball polisher" is a stupid thing to have on a top 10 list of sexy Las Vegas jobs.

And memo to the dancers at the "Crazy Horse Paris"- your accents are legit, but I've met plenty of French people, and none of them are named "Weendy." Sorry.
Sunday, March 2nd, 2008
10:52 pm
Dear Crazy Uncles...
If you don't want me to write snarky emails that make you look stupid in front of your elderly mother, you really shouldn't send me such stupid shit in the first place.
Monday, February 18th, 2008
10:06 am
Dear Facebook and the "iRead" application...
This is the third time you've sent me an email badgering me about whether I've finished "The English Patient." First of all, no, I have not. I thought I would like it because Michael Ondaatje's memoir "Running in the Family" was pretty cool, but it turned out it went on forever with no end in sight- making me quite confused, I must say, by all the buzz that's surrounded it for the past decade. I wound up renting the movie instead just to get to the ending- which, by the way, was also pretty crappy (though the torture scene of Willem Defoe was pretty cool).

So not only have I NOT finished the book, I never will. The book has been returned to the library and will never be re-opened.

Second, the phrasing of your automatic email really irks me:

Are you still working on it? We wanted to send you a reminder, just in case you finished reading the book but forgot to mark it on iRead.

Why do you care? Get out of my face. Stop hassling me. You're turning my pleasure reading into homework. Do you have any idea how many books I have open that I'm "somewhere" in the middle of? Now because of you being an obnoxious bastard of a program, I'm going to have to not record any new book ventures unless I am already close to or have already finished them. So thanks so much, MOM. You've officially killed reading. Hope you're happy.
Tuesday, January 15th, 2008
8:50 pm
Son. Of. Bitch.
New teaching orientation meeting. Guess what? Middle School doesn't count as experience hours for a Multiple-Subject credential, since the classrooms are single-subject. Hmm. The "Middle" in the name should have tipped me off.

Well buttfuck. Now I get to email the nice teacher back saying, "thanks so much for setting this up for me, unfortunately, I can't read.

Bah. I guess I'll try to set something up with the elementary school down the street. And if nothing else, doing some volunteering at the Middle School will still be good experience- and another couple of references.

Still, FUCK!

Edit: Apparently I also cannot properly close a bold tag. Two for two, brain.
Saturday, December 15th, 2007
9:23 pm
Great Day
A - It was nice and sunny out.
B- The kids in my Chinatown class were well-behaved. (Well, except for the sullen high-schoolers who show up late and refuse to talk, and the Middle-Schoolers that only want to write about poop, and the first graders that won't stop playing Yugi-Oh unless I threaten to take them away.)
C- I got paid.
D- I found cheap manga on Ebay.
E- I found cheap comics on Ebay (whoo, new Alan Moore comics!)
F- I found various genealogy info online via newly released databases (marriage dates and certificate numbers, score!)
G- I am slowly getting closer to solving another family mystery (friends that read Hebrew, please email me).
H-My brother flew back today and has been mostly pleasant.
I- The family had a lot of fun playing Taboo. Best quotes: Ben trying to get my Dad to say Book Club: "Ok, it's a thing you read... right, book. And then it's a weapon."
Me: "Book spear! Book sword!"
Dad: "Book weapon!"

Me trying to get Mom to say Mexico- "Ok, that place we went on vacation... we had chips and salsa..."
Mom: "London!"

I laughed so hard my head hurts.

Wednesday, December 5th, 2007
5:41 pm
Why do I keep crying so much?
Seriously, I'm getting confused.
Saturday, November 3rd, 2007
3:41 pm
Another milestone completed
My first termination came and went rather uneventfully. I am not particularly troubled by the fact that I will no longer be working at Ye Olde Random Bank. In fact, I'm pleased I'll never again have to hear about Mustard's nights on the town, dating advice, or period woes.

There's a bunch of things I need to take care of regarding teaching stuff, most of which I haven't yet done. I'm rationalizing it all by saying these last two days were days off to recover. Let's see if I can't get my butt in gear a little by next week.

Speaking of next week, I have a substitute gig on Monday. The subject? Jewish Studies.

Be still my heart.

Oh yeah, I feel kind of cheated regarding the latest earthquake. I was on the phone with my friend and didn't notice most of it until he said, "Wait, is stuff shaking?" I looked around and, lo and behold...

So I actually was oblivious to most of it. Mom and Dad and the dog were upstairs apparently shitting bricks. The GF was on the phone with her folks. Apparently "I made it through the longest earthquake here in over a decade and nothing broke" still has the unfortunate effect of confirming that California has earthquakes, so instead she stuck to her story that it was "just a tremor."

1:25 pm
Stop Imitating My Art, Life
Pat Robertson is a shmuck. We all knew that. But now we know he's also a plagiarizing shmuck.

Hands off my satire, douchebag.
Tuesday, September 4th, 2007
4:54 pm
Anyone See Gangs of New York?
If you did, remember that scene where Daniel Day-Lewis heats a butcher knife and brands DeCaprio on the face with it? And how it gives him this wicked-looking triangular scar across his cheek, and so everyone knows not to screw with him?

Yeah, mine doesn't look like that.

It turns out that I don't know how to exfoliate, and that when rubbing the wet washcloth under my eyes started to hurt, I should not, in fact, have tried to "work through" the pain, but rather have listened to my body, which was screaming, "Stop, you fool!"

Oh, and I certainly shouldn't have made things worse by then going outside without sunscreen (two days of summer a year, I just have to outside and get a tan. I mean, burned). That definitely didn't help.

So now I have a temp assignment at a bank on Thursday. The temp agency tells me to dress up, look expensive, that's how I'll get a higher salary. Fair enough. I just don't know what to do about the fact that I look like I stapled a piece of roadkill to my cheek. Band-aid, maybe?

Oh well. Maybe it will look better by then. It sort of looks better today (actually it looks worse, but it hurts less and I can feel the skin starting to scab).
Saturday, September 1st, 2007
4:43 pm
Stupid first day off.

Woke up at 7 and had to force myself to go back to sleep. Got CBEST scores. Again marveled that my lowest score was in writing. Checked email. Wrote angry rant to EBay merchant that lied about what he was selling me, then pretended that he had been "confused" about what he was selling. Confused? You put up pictures of books you DIDN'T have. That's not confused, that's godamn blind.

Read more...Collapse )

Well, shit. There goes that.
Tuesday, August 28th, 2007
6:30 pm
Passed the CBEST
Scored 68 in reading, 61 in math, and barely squeaked by with a 53 on the essay. That's a little surprising. Then again, given my chosen topics, maybe not so much. Stupid California Educational System anti-incest bias. Where's Bill O'Reilly when you need him. He's supposed to be standing up for little guys like me.

Oh, and my work folk are totally incompetent and need to pay me, like, post-haste. I really want to blame my primary boss but it's hard to because she effectively quit last week. Out of all the things you might expect your boss to say on a Tuesday, "Sorry, I finally acquired my parents' caviar company, I'll be leaving the company soon" isn't high on the list.

And it appears that, barring a sudden change of heart, I will not be working as a TA this coming school year- at least not this semester. I predict I will care more about this when I am not exhausted from work.

Three more days, then a three-day weekend and some quality time with my bed. And hopefully, the sun.

Oh yeah, the GF's heading back to Alabama for a week. Somehow I just know there will be stories. Hopefully tangentially about me.
Saturday, August 11th, 2007
1:11 pm
CBEST done
Yarg. Went to bed too late and woke up too early, but the test was decent. Highlights included me actually being able to get through most of the math and being stymied by an essay question that read, "Most people have ideas about how to improve the world. Write about an issue you would like to change society's views on and explain how this would improve things."

I had trouble thinking of anything that people didn't already agree on- who's pro-child labor anymore, for instance? First I started writing about banning dog racing- which had a line that said, "if we must race something, let it be horses. They're bigger and require a larger investment, so people will be less likely to abuse them. Also, they were bred for transportation. Dogs, by comparison, are fragile, vulnerable, and were not raised to run in circles."

Yeah, so that didn't really work out. I wound up coming up with, "Americans cannot claim to be tolerant while continuing to stigmatize, stereotype and discriminate against people that marry their relatives."

No, seriously. For two pages (handwritten). Afterwards, I told my Mom and she just stared at me. "What is wrong with you? Why didn't you just write about how they should pay teachers more?"

Hmm. Come to think of it, that would have been a good one.

Dad said he wasn't surprised. Me and my brilliant ideas.

Current Mood: Fingers crossed
Friday, August 10th, 2007
11:36 am
Employed at last
(Almost. Sort of.)

I'm going to be doing customer service for a wireless headset company downtown starting next week (mostly via email, so my lack of phone skills won't be too big an issue). Actually, I'm going to be temping for them for three weeks while I wait to hear back from the schools. If the school thing doesn't work out and this job isn't super-soul-sucking, I'll start working there full-time; maybe apply to TA programs for next year, start taking a class or two in education, etc.

Could this be the start of my post-graduation life? Fingers crossed.
Wednesday, August 1st, 2007
3:03 pm
Craiglist musings
Can I be a doorman?

looking for a doorman/bouncer to work on Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights from 10pm-2am. Must be able to work all three nights. Pay is $12.50 per hour.

Job description: check id's, politely tell patrons who are smoking outside to keep the noise level down, politely tell patrons to leave when the bar is closing, keep the front entrance area clean of debris, empty the garbage, restock paper towels and toilet paper. If you can politely tell people to please be quiet 100 times in one night, then this job is for you. Must be 21 or over, professional, neat and groomed appearance, no prior convictions.

Please state age, height and weight in your email along with your resume.

Or a security guard?

We are a real estate, property management company seeking several security guard/ front desk agents for our properties. Good promotion within opportunity. Full time or part time available for night shift. competitive benefits for full time employees. The responsibilities include but are not limited to the following:

1. Answering phones, transfer to the right department;
2. Provide customer services to the guests and prospective tenants in terms of building vacancy, and rates.
3. Check in & out tenant visitors.
4. Show vacant units to prospective tenants
5. Rove (walk through) different floors and inspect common areas of the
buildings, making sure the building is safe and well maintained.
6. In any case the tenants break the building house rules, e.g. loud
noise, unauthorized visitors, etc. you need to take appropriate measures to intervene the situation.
7. Help resolve tenant issues and emergency situations
8. Maintain property log book, prepare daily report.

I'm really starting to regret making fun of all those Reedies who go on to work as CSOs after graduation. At least they have a freaking marketable skill.
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